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July 14, 2015

I don't even know how to start this post.. July 14, 2015 was the day that my son finally came into this world and made me a mommy.



It's the day I've been waiting for my entire life and I can't believe it's already come and gone. I've never had so many emotions come through me in just one day and I really need to write about it before I forget everything. This post is gonna be really long because I want to remember everything, so be prepared for my novel. :) (I'm also not leaving anything out so if you're sqeeamish and don't want the details, don't read anymore!)

We're even gonna start the day before... K the week before... ha. 2 weeks before my due date we go into the doc's office for our regular appointment and had a pretty crazy scare. I'd been having intense swollen feet forever but they said it wasn't a big deal all by itself. But at this appointment they took my blood pressure like they always do but it was super high. So doc comes in the room and says that these symptoms together could mean preeclampsia, so we're gonna go to the hospital and do some tests. I asked him what it would mean if they came back positive and he said "Well we're gonna have a baby today or tomorrow." I looked over at Justin and his face was as white as our sheets. I was a little nervous but excited. Not super nervous because the cure for preeclampsia is to have a baby so it wasn't really endangering me or my baby but I'm not sure Justin really understood that. Poor thing. We went home and I threw my hospital bag together but left it home in case it wasn't actually time. Anyway, long story short we went to the hopsital and the tests came back negative. Good news cuz I wasn't sick and baby was ok but honestly I was a little bummed cuz I was so ready to be done being prego. haha. But no luck. Doc sent us home and I was on unofficial bed rest, meaning I basically had to just take it easy. So I did for the next few days.

... So next Monday rolls around... Another appointment with the amazing Dr. Judd. Honestly I was hoping my bp was high again so we could have the baby early but Justin kept insisting that it wouldn't happen. He kept reminding me how doc was sure I'd go late and that I shouldn't get my hopes up. I was near tears sitting on the table waiting for him to come in thinking about going a whole other week of being pregnant. I was SO DONE. Luckily he came in and said "Alright! Let's have a baby!" My heart skipped a beat and I said "Wait really?!" haha. He checked my cervix and said I wasn't dilated or effaced at all, maybe a 1 or 2 but only barely. But basically my bp was up again and there was protein in my urine which was one more sign that pointed towards preeclampsia so we weren't going to wait till I actually got really sick. I was officially 39 weeks so he could induce with no problems and he was gonna call the hospital to set it up. I was jumping for joy inside!! Justin was a little nervous tho. haha. I felt bad cuz I've really been ready for this for a long time but he was counting on atleast another week if not 2. We went home and he spent the whole day cleaning and finishing the nursery and trying to get ready. We got our bags packed and had everything set out and ready. The hospital called and told us to be there at 4 am the next morning and to not be late because I guess that's when all the inductions start so we would be behind anyone that got there before us. Ha. And no, we did not really sleep that night. haha. I went to bed at prolly 11 but didn't fall asleep till at least midnight....

My alarm was set for 2:30 the next morning so I could get up and shower and be ready. (No I don't need and hour and a half to get ready but I push the snooze button way too much so I give myself more time than I need.) There was no snooze button this morning tho. haha. I was too excited. I got all ready and got in the car. I wanted to take pics of everything so I started early but it didn't last long. haha. The very first pic of the day..


This looked different not very long after cuz we put all the food in. I just realized we never took a pic of all the crazy food! It's become a tradition to go Costco and have treats for everyone that comes to visit and our nurse just thought it was hilarious that we had that much food. haha. 


We delivered at Orem Community Hospital that's literally 3 blocks from our house. In fact there's a park all the way around the hospital and it's where we take Brody for his walk every day. Very convenient for us. :) I took the above picture as we were walking in. 


This is the bulletin board where they wrote everything for us. We still hadn't decided what his name would be... 


The nurse put my IV in and tried to do it on my arm.. (see the little extra gauze..) But apparently it wasn't a very good vein so they did it again on my hand. That was literally the most painful thing most of the day. ha. Major bummer. It was so annoying!!

They started me on pitosin to get my labor going and on a magnesium compound that was supposed to keep me from seizing from the preeclampsia. But apparently the mag kind of counteracts the pitosin so I didn't progress hardly at all... I had toyed with the idea of doing a totally natural birth but given the situation I decided it was better to go with the flow. This meant I didn't want the epidural right way but it didn't seem to matter because of the two counteracting drugs. I felt contractions but they were little and I was watching TV like normal. It was about 830 when I started to get some intense pain and needed to go to the bathroom so I called the nurse in to help me get there with all the wires that were attached to me. I sat up and all of a sudden my water broke. It was SUPER gross!!! The pain I was feeling was more contractions. I was told later that eventually the pitosin wins over the mag and women get pretty sudden intense contractions. So there I was! I put a towel between my legs and hobbled to the bathroom and let a TON more water come out in there. And then I had more contractions while sitting on the toilet. I threw up in the trash can and was in really serious pain. I looked up and Justin was standing there and asked if he could help. I felt like the single most unattractive woman in the world and there really wasn't anything he could so I told him to tell the nurse I was ready for my epidural. haha. I felt like a light weight that I lasted all of 10 minutes of real contractions but the nurse told me it was normal because of the drug interactions. 

So I got back to the bed finally even though I was still leaking fluid. (Seriously the worst feeling ever...) The anesthesiologist showed up only a few minutes later and we got started. I was still having contractions every 2 to 3 minutes though and it was intense! So not fun. I sat up on the side of the bed and he told me what I needed to do to get the epidural started. It was tough cuz I was still having contractions. Justin was there to hold my hand but the nurse was at her station thingy and kinda in the way so Justin couldn't do a whole lot. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Little pinches but never very intense pain. mostly I was grateful for the relief. ha. But then just a couple minutes after it was done I started getting a pretty intense ringing in my ears and my vision went blurry and I had to throw up. The drugs had made my blood pressure plummet and I threw up in the little blue bags. But it was weird cuz I didn't have full control of my stomach muscles from the drugs. Strangest feeling ever... trying to gag but having nothing behind it. Not a feeling I ever want again but it doesn't look like I get that choice. When they re upped it later for the c- section the exact same thing happened again. Apparently I don't react well to epidurals! Bummer. ha

So that little episode was pretty intense. Poor Justin had to watch his wife go through all this with basically nothing he could do about it.. This was him pretty much the whole day.. 


What he did do was hold my hand the whole time and stand next to me and tell me I was amazing. I could not have gotten through this day with out him. I have the greatest husband in the world and I feel so lucky to have him. Thank you Justin for being so incredible!



My mom showed up at about 9:30 and started taking pictures and doing the mom thing. She was pretty awesome too. I have her to thank for almost every one of these photos and I am SO grateful!!! The pics are amazing but she also held my hand and rubbed my feet and my legs and got me ice and did everything I needed from her. I have the best mom in the world! Seriously y'all.. I have the best support system there ever was. I feel so lucky to have such incredible people around me. :)


Speaking of awesome support, my sweet sister came over and brought me flowers. :) She also brought my favorite second nephew and lunch for my hubby. ha. He came running in with my flowers and it made me very happy. ha. 







Don't I look sexy?! haha. Prolly not my best moments but I guess not my worst. This was me pretty much the whole day, playing candy crush and watching TV. After the drama of the epidural it actually became my best friend! I could feel when there were contractions and they were uncomfortable but not painful. And they never really got closer than 3-4 minutes apart. They were pretty mild. We eventually got to sleep a little. Justin pretty much passed out on the couch they had for him which I was so grateful for. I apparently snored for about 30 minutes although I felt like I was only semi asleep the whole time... 


(can you see Justin in this pic?! I actually love this pic cuz you don't notice him till you actually look. haha. Thanks mom!)

At about 6:30 Dr Judd came in and checked me and gave us the bad/good news. (still not sure which. ha) He said that I had progressed to only a 5, which was only 3 ish cm in almost 14 hours. He had also not dropped into the birth canal. Short little lesson.. When the baby is "at a 0" it means he's even with the pelvis and when they're ready to deliver they're at a -6. So Baby Ty started at a +2 (meaning higher up inside) and was either still there or hadn't passed my pelvis when I was checked. So the doc
basically said it's time for a c-section. He did say that I could probably labor for another 14 hours and have a c-section then if I wanted. NO THANK YOU!

I looked up at Justin tho and he was in actual tears. Doc said he'd give us a minute to talk about it and that he'd be waiting outside when we were ready to let him know. Doc walked out and so did Justin. I was a little confused but understood that he needed a minute. My parents agreed that it was the right choice to go ahead with the c and move on but it was obviously our choice. Justin came back and we sent everyone else out. We had a moment to ourselves and he kinda broke down a little. He said he was sad because nothing in this whole experience of bringing a baby to this world had gone the way I wanted it. We couldn't get pregnant, my pregnancy was super hard, I had to be induced, I couldn't do it without drugs, and now I wasn't going to be able to deliver naturally. I felt mixed emotions about it the whole thing. I was certainly a little disappointed because he was right that I had a vision about how I wanted things to be. But if I'm being totally honest, the longer I thought about pushing a baby through my who-ha the less I wanted to do it. haha. I was mostly sad that Justin felt the way he did. However, above it all, the most important thing was that baby was healthy and happy and that he was coming. Regardless of how he came, what mattered was that he was coming and everything else was secondary. So we called in the doc and said lets do it!

Doc said there was a window where those that wanted to could watch the whole thing, so we called the sisters that we thought would want to see it and told them to hurry their butts over. He said they would be ready shortly and have baby out in only a few minutes. The anesthesiologist came back and re-did my epidural to make me completely numb and surprise surprise, I had the blurry vision and ringing ears and I threw up again. This time was worse because I was COMPLETELY numb and had zero function of my stomach muscles to gag so it was even more difficult to actually throw up. Like I said earlier, weirdest feeling ever! I'm so in the camp that if you feel sick and think you need to throw up just do it. So I was trying to and couldn't until my stomach actually forced it out. Not sure how else to describe it but maybe it's better left unsaid anyway. haha.

This was also a tough moment for Justin. He does NOT do well with blood and needles and stuff. He turns away when there's any kind of anything even on TV when it's fake! I was genuinely worried about him. But Doc knew about our concerns and did a great job of helping him stay behind the curtain and not see anything he didn't want to see. He also bent the rules and allowed my mother to come into the operating room to take pictures! He said it wasn't allowed but since he was older than everyone there combined they would listen to him. haha. We came to really love Dr. Judd. :)


Mom and Justin all ready to go in the operating room! I'm sure they were smiling behind their masks. :)


Justin was such a trooper. Dr Judd even complimented him. Maybe I talked him down too much. ha. I'm sorry love! You are amazing!


Last chat with Zina before he went in!


The crew waiting for it to start... 



That's My sister in law Zina holding her precious Brookie, my amazing cousin/doula Jessica in the orange shirt, then my sister Kristi holding her 2 month old baby girl Peyton, and then Smelly Kelly. :)


Where they would put baby when he came out... 


The monitors before they were monitoring baby Ty.. 


Hurry and get behind that curtain before they start!



And they start cutting!

I forgot to say that I wanted to watch the whole thing but I got dizzy on the operating table and had to throw up. Hence the pic below.. :( 


Justin was amazing and rubbed my head the whole time and helped hold my throw up bag. That's love right there. 


Looking through the window ready to watch! 


Can you see the look on my dad's face?? haha. I love it!


Eventually I got to watch on a mirror that the nurse held up (can you see it in the pic above??) but I didn't see him start cutting. I did get to see them cut and use the suction and the metal thingys to pull me apart?! It was kind of weird to watch! It was just like the movies but then I realized it was me! Ha. Super awesome. I loved it. 


That gross looking bump is actually Baby Ty's hairy head!


Here he comes...!!!



This is one of my fav pics. haha. I LOVE her face!! I prolly would have been the same way. 


This is from Kelly's phone from the side. It's not nearly as clear but I love that you can see his whole body. 



This is from mom and is prolly the same moment. I'm so lucky to have so many views! I love seeing Dr Judd in this pic too. The doc on the other side is also a little important. While they were pulling him out, he had to push on the top of my belly to help. Apparently he was pretty wedged up in there! I remember him saying he was glad they did a c-section cuz baby was wedged up in there super high. It made me feel really good about the fact that we chose to do the c after all.  





Baby was born at 7:27!!!


This was me the whole time... I felt SO many emotions in this position.. Laying there made me feel very exposed and vulnerable.. Then i got to see them cutting into me and all I could think was "WOW" ... and then I remember hearing him cry for the first time and I lost it. Justin and I looked at each other and said "We did it." It makes me cry to just think about that moment when he was finally here. I couldn't stop crying. It was a beautiful moment that I'll never forget.  


Carrying baby Ty over to the monitors to get all cleaned up. 



Baby Ty didn't like it so much. haha. He still doesn't like being naked and cold. 

 


Look at the sweetheart!


The nurse came over and told the stats to all the people in the window. 
I don't know what all the stuff means but on the right side it says "In 1910 Start 1922 and Baby 1927." This means I was in the operating room at 7:10, they started operating at 7:22 and by 7:27 he was born! I thought that was super cool. 

This is nurse Ana! She was awesome!! She held the baby for the time all bundled up! She also held the mirror for me. Thank Ana! :) She was also the nurse that was there in the morning when I came in and had asked me about what I wanted for the day. One thing she mentioned was having baby skin to skin right after he was born. Fortunately she remembered that and as soon as they were finished checking him out and making sure he was ok, she brought him over to me... 


This is another moment I won't forget for as long as I live. She unwrapped the bundle and set my sweet baby boy on my chest. I could hardly see him through my tears. It was the perfect moment. 


I love this first family picture! This may also be the moment when we looked at each other and Justin said "It's Tyler Craig.. isn't it?" We both cried and looked at him and cried some more and looked at each other and cried some more then looked at him some more. 



I'm glad you can't see my tears and super red face but I wouldn't have cared either way. haha


As sad as I was, I was SO exhausted so I was glad Ana stayed there to help hold him! And then she took him and re bundled him and gave him to Justin. 



And another moment I'll never forget.. (I know I've said that A LOT but this was kinda a never forget kinda day. :)
This was the first time I saw Justin hold his son and it was incredible. Something I've been looking forward to for a long time. I couldn't contain myself, hence my hand on my face. 



Yay Justin! You're a daddy!


This is the Anesthesiologist carefully watching over me. He had to readjust everything several times cuz apparently I'm a light weight! Who knew?! I threw up twice on the operating table and he was there to help catch it. haha. Poor guy. He was really nice tho. 


His name is either Nick or Rick. haha. 




Love this!!


Justin left the operating room while they finished up with me and took Baby Ty to see the fam. 


This is probably one of my favorite pictures of all times. Justin's face is priceless. He might be upset that I published a picture of him crying but I can't help but love this. And to be totally honest I love that he is emotional and sensitive. We obviously had a bunch of these emotional moments this day but we've also had a few since and it makes me really happy to share those with him. :) 


Three generations! Grandpa, Dad and Baby Tycicle!


He still puts his fingers in his mouth like this!



Smelly and Jared love Tyler!


They finally wheeled me in and I was NOT feeling so great. ha. I didn't have the strength to hold him but I was glad that everyone else did. :) I was in quite a bit of pain from the surgery for the first maybe 30 minutes after I got to the room (hence my lovely expression) but it eventually went away with some awesome drugs.



I tried to smile but it was tough. haha. 


Grandpa with his grand-sicle! (This nick name came from the fact that baby Ty started his life as a frozen embryo that had to be thawed before they put him in me. I actually love it!)


Holding him that night! 


Justin got to go to the nursery with him to watch/help them give him his first bath!


Apparently he didn't like it very much. ha


Well.. that night we were up for a while. I did get a chance to breast feed him and he latched on pretty well with the help of the nurse that was there all night. She was amazing and super helpful. Justin's mom arrived at about 1:30 that night so we didn't sleep a ton. ha. I guess we didn't really expect to sleep and were kind of running on adrenaline but we had a total of maybe 4 hours of sleep over 48 hours and I had been through 14 hours of labor and a challenging c-section. I was soo done with the day. They put baby Ty in the little box and wheeled him next to me and we tried to fall asleep. I don't know how well we actually slept but we tried! 


Over all it was an incredible day. I have to thank my mother again for the incredible pictures and for the support she gave me all day long. Thank you Justin for being the most incredible hubby and for being the best dad there ever was. I love you more than you'll ever know. And baby Ty, thank you for making me a mommy and for being the best baby in the world.

 If you've made it through and read this whole thing.. thank you! haha. I hope it wasn't boring. I'm glad I got to write it all down so I won't forget. There will be more to come of the struggles in the hospital and the last three weeks but for now I'm gonna go cook dinner for my hubby. :)

Comments

  1. My eyes filled with tears as I felt your joy and the problems you had, too. Nine of my grandkids were born there, so I'm pretty familiar with that window! We are so happy for you and Justin. No ones deserves a baby more than you two! Love you!

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  2. Jessie, this is so beautiful!! You will be so glad that you recorded as many details as you can remember. You have some amazing pictures too- wow. That's all I can say. SO beautiful :)

    I hope everything is going ok as you adjust to this new life! There are so many changes & struggles that you go through that no one can tell you about beforehand because it is so different for everybody. Breastfeeding was always a super-big challenge for me, unfortunately. So excited to meet baby Ty!

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